Warriors, Kompressor battle to tie, Thrashas thrash Niledrivers

Belated but not forgotten, here's the second half of match reports from Wraithfire Conference's opening week.

We begin with a highly-anticipated battle between two veteran coaches, as the brutish forces of the Slaaneshgrad Kompressor met the high-speed Skaven squad of the Warprat Warriors. The fans in attendance were overwhelmingly in support of the Chaos team, though the noise may have distracted the stoic Kompressor, as their opening kickoff was nothing short of abysmal. On the touchback, hulking rat-ogre Ratz was given the ball, and in a rare display of focus by a big guy, Ratz was able to power his way downfield and score an early opening touchdown for the Warriors.

As play resumed, Chaos warrior Subutai quickly gathered up the ball and surged forward through a maelstrom of violence, but was eventually dragged down by the Warprat defense. Frustrated beyond control, Subutai leaped to his feet and set upon linerat Blinky with murderous intent. Blinky was left in a crumpled heap with his head pointing the wrong way around, and was dragged off with the level of care one would expect for an unskilled laborer. Subutai's return to the melee was enough to turn the tide for the Kompressor, and beastman Loki had the presence of mind to pick up the ball and score the equalizer before the end of the half.

The second half began as a testament to the nature of the game: occasionally inspiring, frequently cringeworthy. The Kompressor were dominating the line of scrimmage, leaving several Skaven stunned in the mud, but it took several attempts by the beastmen to corral the ball and start the offense moving. Ankou finally picked the elusive ball up, and got the Big Grey Machine rolling forward. The massive Ratz attempted to stymie Ankou's progress, but tripped and fell, and spent the remainder of the drive angrily roaring at the sky. When the touchdown seemed secured, the Chaos squad appeared content to hold off and let time tick away, but a surge of gutter runners managed to shove Ankou into the end zone, allowing them some small shred of time with which to battle back.

The Kompressor smartly set up a prevent defense, allowing the Skaven to gain ground but hopefully keeping them from tying the score once more. The Warriors weren't about to quit, though, and a surge downfield led by Ratz gained them significant ground. Thrower Skitter passed the ball off to Krahzi Greycloak, and while the beastmen did their best, they couldn't knock over the diminutive and dodgy Skaven. Greycloak scored, and time expired, resulting in a spirited, if unsatisfying, tie match.

MVPs of the game were Hades of the Kompressor and Steelfur of the Warriors.

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The final match saw the mysterious Alexslamdria Niledrivers against the heavy-hitting horde of the Ghazghkull Thrashas. From start to finish it was clear to see what kind of game the Thrashas had come to play, and the tone they set echoed throughout the stadium and through the skulls of those players they knocked over. Barely concerned with the ball, the orcs throttled everything they could, dishing out severe injuries to blitzers Cleosmacktra and Tuts McGee. The battle was so intense that the orcs forgot that there was, in fact, a game to be won, and by the time they had remembered what they were supposed to do with the ball, time had run out in the first half.

Things did not go much better for the Niledrivers after halftime. They managed a single passing play before the green tide of orcish fury washed over them. Another injury was suffered, this time by a linewoman with too much mud on her uniform to identify her, courtesy of hard-tackling line orc Forq, with a patented bodyslam move he calls the Forqlift. His linemate Zorq got his calloused hands on the ball, and after what seemed like an eternity (or two eternities for the beleaguered Niledrivers) the Thrashas scored the only touchdown of the game.

MVPs of the match were Forq of the Thrashas, who had great success in tackling down the nimble Niledrivers, and a linewoman who couldn't be identified, or at least wasn't prepared to give our correspondent any comment other than a punch in the kidney.